To The Girl Who Once Took Up Space Without Apology

This one is for the happy-go-lucky girl we all end up losing in our bids to be the so-called "good women". 

Honestly, as a daughter maine kabhi patriarchy feel hi nahin ki thi. Main to bhaiya se rakhi bhi bandhwati thi. Ulta being the youngest kid in the house, I was the most pampered child. 

But an year into marriage, I am amazed at the endless list of patriarchal patterns I never saw coming until I realised how secondary a woman's position is. And the strangest thing is my husband and my male seniors are actually the ones with whom I have been able to get my point across without offending them. For the many women I used to admire, adjustment and two days of silent visits are a go to advice. 

I used to smile jab humare domestic help paani peeke humesha bolte the badia badia naukri lge, humesha khush rahe;  ab to Aashirwad mein bhi sirf pati ki lambi umr ki baat hoti h. And the moment a women speaks up for herself she becomes anti-men. 

Honestly, the fact that unlike many other parents my mom continues to stand up for me, visited me in Chandigarh at the drop of a tear has been my strength. 

 

In a society that thrives on minimising women, I wish people would just teach their daughters to occupy all the space they need. Every time I visit our village I hear someone express how our generation makes up for bad wives, bad mothers and daughter in laws just because we are working.  

Honestly, all we seek is respect and that feeling of being seen and heard that was simply our normal back home, but society itself forces us to wear a feminist hat and then label us as "Bad".